how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
