im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
