Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
