I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
