The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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