And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
