do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Randomize
