that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Randomize