Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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