also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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