i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Randomize
