You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
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