I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
