Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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