i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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