I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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