this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
