Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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