apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
