Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
