Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize