Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Duck Duck Cougar?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
