it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
