u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
