Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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