No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
