the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
