wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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