do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
