I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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