Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I intend to get homeless drunk
We left the knife in your bed.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
