just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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