is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
