Need sex. Gaining weight.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
