I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
