Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
