this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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