Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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