Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
