Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
