I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
