Christians are straight up FREAKS
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
