I cockslap morals
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize
