Ambien. No doubt about it.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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