the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
