We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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