I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
