question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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