well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
