been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I had to cum in my sink.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
